That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
We need a shit load of segways right now
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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