1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
