Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
The air was thick with penises
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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