worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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