Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
