A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
