New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
