there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
3pm strippers are depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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