i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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