I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize