i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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