Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
He shit in the fireplace
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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