Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
