The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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