Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
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