it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize