dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
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mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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