wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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