fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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