Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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