i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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