Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
