I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
