weddingsv make me drug and hornr
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
