I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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