Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize