Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
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