Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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