How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
