I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
