I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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