Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Randomize
