fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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