Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize