Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
