I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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