somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Randomize