Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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