the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
