We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
