we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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