i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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