Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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