Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
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