return my video game
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
