Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
