I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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