Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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