when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
