shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
